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Info Just for ... Teens
Rape is a violent sexual act committed against a person’s will.
- Rape is not sex. Rape is an expression of power and control in which a person uses a sexual act as a means of violence.
- Rape victims belong to both sexes, all races and ethnic groups, all economic backgrounds, and all ages.
- Acquaintance rape is forced, unwanted sexual contact between a person and a known assailant.
- Adolescent women are at a higher risk for sexual violence than any other age group. Part of the reason for this is the large number date/acquaintance rapes that occur at this age.
What to do if a friend tells you she/he has been raped
- Believe what your friend tells you;
- Accept what you hear without judgment;
- Listen actively and openly;
- Reinforce that the rape was not your friend’s fault;
- Be sincere;
- Be there for your friend when she/he needs you;
- Look for opportunities to point out your friend’s strengths and positive aspects;
- Ask open-ended questions to allow your friend to talk it out;
- Suggest calling a Rape Crisis Center;
- Accept your friend’s decisions in dealing with the rape;
- Be aware of your limitations;
- Be careful not to play a role that is not natural to you;
- Try not to tell your friend what to do;
- Silence is okay;
- Be aware that your friend may direct negative feelings toward you;
- Do not argue with your friend;
- Know that you cannot "cure" your friend;
- Say "I’m sorry that this happened to you;"
- Do not compare the situation to "worse" ones you know, and;
- Validate your friend’s feelings.
Statistics
- 1 in 3 girls and 1 in 6 boys are sexually assaulted before the age of 18 (Russel, D. 1988. The Incidence and Prevalence of Sexual Abuse of Female Children.)
- The risk of rape is 4 times higher among women aged 15 to 24 (Harlow, 1991).
- 38% of all date rape victims are females between the ages of 14 and 17(Bart, P. A. and P. H. O’Brien. 1985. Stopping Rape. New York: Pergamon Press, pg. 131.)
- 92% of for the Prevention and Control of Rape. 1984. Newsweek, April 9.)
- 57% of all rapes occur in the context of a date (Koss, Woodruff, Koss study, 1990)
Common feelings felt by rape survivors
- Fear
- Guilt
- Loss of control
- Embarrassment
- Anxiety, shaking, nightmares
- Concern for the rapist
- Wondering--Why me?
- Shame
- Anger
Every survivor of sexual assault reacts differently.
What to do if you are the victim of sexual violence
- Contact a friend, relative, neighbor, teacher, counselor, etc. Do not feel alone; there are people who can give you the emotional support you need.
- Report the attack to the police whether or not you plan to file charges. Rarely do rapists attack only one person; they may get away with it and continue to rape.
- Seek medical attention. Do not shower or clean up first. As soon as
possible, go to a hospital or health center. Get examined and treated for possible venereal disease and pregnancy. You may also have internal injuries of which you are unaware.
- Contact your local sexual assault services. You have been through a traumatic event and will benefit from dealing with your feelings. Survivors who get counseling recover from the attack quicker and with fewer lasting effects than survivors who get no help.
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